After attempting to use fake tickets, Kneeler-In-Chief Colin Kaepernick and 11 of his pals were turned away from the Super Bowl gates. Police were initially called to handle the matter, but they quickly learned Kaepernick wasn’t the offender. He bought the tickets on the internet.
“These things wouldn’t have passed for a regular season game at half capacity, never mind the Super Bowl,” said Joe Barron, the Guest Relations Coordinator at ALLOD Stadium. “One would think someone with knowledge of football would know how football tickets work.”
Kaepernick paid nearly $100K for the tickets, which makes no difference. “He doesn’t have real tickets, so he doesn’t get a seat.”
A protest that was supposed to be led by the former player near the 50-yard line on the other side, aisle 11, was quickly postponed. They also refused to let him enter the pre-game VIP party, which was included in his phony tickets.
We were just as startled as he was, said Barron, “but mostly because there isn’t one.”
It just makes sense that Kaepernick would experience this kind of retribution. His companions, who were also guilty by implication, had an important lesson to learn. The Dunning-Kruger Times is a foregone conclusion when you support a lefty. Godspeed to the USA.